Married Freaks

So we spent Saturday evening out on a friend’s deck enjoying the lovely springtime weather. There was a little wind and delicious food.

And seven naked people.

Yep, Saturday night, Clint and I had dinner with some nudists. We were told the nature of the party when we were invited, but I have to admit that when I approached the door and could see through the glass, a voice in the back of my head said, “Gah! Naked People.”

But they had invited us into their world, so we were determined to overcome the internal awkward freak out and check this phenomenon out.  I mean, we’re all about nudity at home when it’s just the two of us.  Even regular mundane activities like making coffee.  (Just don’t fry things in the nude.  Clothing does have purposes beyond modesty. Ow!)

We’ve just never been nude socially.  Truth be told, we still haven’t.  And the nudists were quite accepting of us ‘textiles.’  So much so that, the evening was certainly less weird and uncomfortable than we had steeled ourselves up for.

One thing of note, if you find yourself at a nudist gathering, take special note of people’s names.  Because you can’t come back later and say, “Oh what was her name in the blue dress?”  Nope, you’re going to find yourself trying to say anything other than, “Oh what was her name with the lovely breasts?”  At which point you’ve just admitted that you looked.  (Oh yes, you did.)  You’re going to see it.  Don’t stare.  Ever find yourself in the direct line of sight of someone’s crotch when they get up from the table where you are seated?  Well at a nudist party, you will see nut sack.  Not because you’ve set out to see it, but it’s just going to happen. But just like no one is there to check each out in the nude, they aren’t hiding their nudity from you.  It’s just a thing that is.  And the sight of such things usually kept private was really only of note to us.  It wasn’t sexy or titillating.  Just different and new.

Conversation was lively and interesting.  There were all different body shapes and sizes there.  At no point did anyone compare bit and pieces.  In fact, it was mostly like any other party, just where the majority of the guests are nude.  We made new friends and enjoyed chatting with old friends.  And in fact, the lady of the house whom we’ve known for some time was far more at ease than we’d ever seen her.  I suppose when it’s all just out there, you can be fairly confident that people aren’t putting on any airs.  At the very least, people have got to put any body image issues aside.

Things of note.  People have a smell.  In fact, each individual has a unique smell.  It’s not a bad smell or anything.  It’s just something that I hadn’t really noticed from anyone beyond Clint because clothing masks a person’s smell.  I’m sure that is due to the detergents and the actual fibers themselves.  And when you hug a naked person, you notice their smell.

Also, it forced me to really observe faces to attach to the names.  And it forces you to get to know a person.  It really is surprising how much the way a person is dressed makes you put them subconsciously into certain boxes.  Or, at least I do anyway.  And no, I don’t think less you you if you aren’t wearing designer duds, but I can make assumptions about your interests if you are wearing a printed t-shirt from some kind of event.  I have a piece of information about you if you choose jeans, shorts, or slacks to a patio party.  Deprive me of those clues, and I’ve got to learn directly from the person.  And that is interesting.

If there are any nudists in our readership, I hope I haven’t crossed any lines or been offensive.  I am really quite grateful to have been invited in and given a sample of the lifestyle.  I no longer have to remind myself that nudists are just regular people.  I know it.  Those that I met were vibrant, friendly, and engaging.  It’s way less weird to me now.

Would I go to another nudist party?  Probably, but I have to admit that I’m just not ready to strip down myself.