When Clint and I first got married we were excited for all the new adventures and exploration of each other. We got a few catalogs (can’t remember which) and ordered some toys. We had no idea what we were doing or where to go for help. And they came with complimentary porn*.
I became intimidated and freaked out by them. So into a drawer they went.
Let me explain. As the new wife, I wanted to be sexually perfect for my new husband. If we needed toys or porn to get everything going, then I just new I was a horrible failure. And that’s not even getting into the most offensive thing ever (at the time) LUBE!
I had plenty of that pouring out naturally thank you very much.
Oh poor naive newlywed Penny.
Granted, if we needed any of those extra things, there might be some kind of issue. But toys are fun and a twist in your sexual routine. They aren’t about need. And using one on your partner requires a new level of trust.
And lube. Yeah, there’s LOTS of that naturally, but everyone can run low at times for a variety of reasons. Marathon sessions and stress come to mind… It is no bash against your womanhood. Nor is it a bash against his manhood if he can’t get your juices flowing. Is your mind turned on? Great. Think of the lube as starter fluid then. Neither of you will be happy going for it dry.
And I hear that they even make some lubes that warm up and tingle and other wonderful things. We haven’t tried any of those things yet, but we’d be willing. (contact me if you are interested in having us test something.)
So we’ve reopened the fun drawer and are becoming reacquainted with treasures inside. And they are fun. It’s not intimidating to play with them. In fact, if your partner wants to play with toys with you, it is probably because they trust you enough to get out of the vanilla. And also because they believe you are a wonderful sexual creature that they want to share new and exciting adventures with.
Wondering where to start? Try one of the glass ones. They are easy to sterilize (you can throw it in the dishwasher and embarrass your mother when she gets too helpful in the kitchen). You can use any kind of lube, but it’s not necessarily required. No batteries and lots of options. Try chilling it sometime.
*The free porn is not good porn. You have the internet, find what turns you on. I’m partial to Hentai.